The contract is guaranteed.
The contract is signed.
I do not care,
my cool.
Tell you right now.
If the whole deck of cards falls over.
This company goes bankrupt.
Every part of it can burn down to the ground.
I will not care.
I have a golden parachute, my cool.
I do not give a fuck what happens to the company.
I am assured to get mine, my cool.
This is what happens when you are second in command.
You get to achieve supreme money power.
God damn it.
I do not have a care in the world.
Let me tell you why.
There can be a natural disaster which results in fire.
Every card in the house can be taken.
The company files Chapter 7.
I will be alright.
I have a golden parachute,
and I am ready to deploy it at the first sign of trouble.
My cool,
If anything happens to this company.
Anything at all.
I am set.
I am set for life, my cool.
Do you hear me?
If anything bad happens, I will let the subordinates figure it out.
I have a parachute, my cool.
And this thing is golden.
I want to be able to use it.
Tell you right now,
Hunkies run this shit.
I am the best god damn hunky in the whole company.
Second in the company.
God damn it.
I'm very good, very intelligent.
This is how you become second in the company.
Tell you right now,
If I see a way where I can get a bigger bonus
I will do it.
Who cares what happens after my bonus?
My cool,
I am second in command.
I am better than all of the other idiots who work here.
I hate them.
They are lazy assholes, my cool.
Bunch of crybaby losers.
Tell you right now.
You can not tell me they are any good.
I am second in command for a reason.
I am somebody important.
I worked hard and do not complain.
If anyone below me loses their job, what do I care my cool?
What did they ever do to keep their job?
They waste company time running their mouths.
If they are women, I just let them know that I know I could put my dick in their mouths.
I call the men the pieces of shit that they are.
I can't put my dick in their mouths because I am not a fag,
my cool.
Tell you right now,
if you take a job at the company
you are a idiot.
I will see to it that I make as much as I possibly can off of you.
I do not care if terrorists bomb each of our companies properties and kills everyone else but me,
I could care less if the deck of cards is knocked over with brute force.
Bankruptcy is not an issue for me.
I have my golden parachute and can retire at any second with guaranteed money,
God damn it.
Tell you right now,
I am second in command of the company.
I am out to fuck you if you work for the company.
Not literally, my cool, unless you are a woman in this company.
In that case, you and I both know that I have probably already fucked you;
and fucked you raw
just as you like it.
I have the biggest penis in the entire company.
I know this because nearly all of the women in this company have told me so.
The women all tell me, "Old Man Kielbasa, your dick is twice the size of my boyfriend's penis".
Or the woman say, "Old Man Kielbasa, your pecker is thrice the size of my husband's"
Women love my penis because I am top dog, my cool.
You only get golden parachutes as nice as the one I have with a large Hunky penis.
I could have very easily signed the contract with my penis.
The contract gives me guaranteed money when I leave my cool.
The company could teeter on the edge of bankruptcy.
Our house of cards can fall to the ground.
If arson occurs I do not care.
I have a golden parachute that I can deploy.
My cool,
I have to tell you right now.
At the very instant I feel like doing so,
I will deploy this god damn golden parachute.
I earned the right to do so, my cool.
I do not need to care if the whole house of cards loses its foundation.
I am set for the rest of my life.
I will have leg of lamb every Friday at Dubex.
While the rest of the employees here can only afford to eat at the Blue Dubai.
I will be eating leg of lamb.
God damn it.
The leg of lamb tastes even better knowing that I did everything I possibly could to get concessions from the workers.
I am somebody.
I made something of myself.
Not only did I have sex with nearly every woman in the company during the past few decades,
I also proved that I am top dog.
So even if the whole company were to erupt in a ball of flame.
Or if the company has to liquidize.
I am going to deploy my golden parachute
when I know that that the shit is going to hit the fan.
I will jump out of the burning building
while deploying my golden parachute with my enormous penis.
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